Alexander & Hephaestion's New Adventures in the Twenty-second Century
by zhouhua00
Summary: Alexander and Hephaestion's resurrection and their new adventures in the twenty-second century.
1. Chapter 1 - The Resurrection

I cannot believe the day would come that I am publishing a story...me, an enthusiastic reader but not a writer at all!

This story is about Alexander and Hephaestion's resurrection and their new adventures in the twenty-second century. It is purely fictional, of course.

Actually I am not the writer but the translator. It is originally written by a Chinese fan with the pen name of 矢车菊. The story is well-liked and highly recommended by many Alexander fans in China.

As a tribute to Alexander's death anniversary today, I translated the first chapter of the story and published it here. Hope you will enjoy the story as much as I do!  
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Chapter 1: The resurrection of Alexander (Part One)

Alexander made a great effort, and finally he managed to crack his eyes open a little, he sensed that his eyelids were as heavy as if filled with lead.

The strong light forced him to close his eyes again. He could not remember how long it had been that he saw any light. He felt light-headed and dizzy, vague about anything that happened before.

He forced himself up, and opened his eyes to look around no matter how much effort it might take. The outside world seemed to be very noisy, and he simply couldn't afford to lie around doing nothing.

He finally overcame the stimulus of the fierce light, and opened his eyes wide.

It was a big clean space as white as snow. He did not know what space this is, because it did not seem like a house, or a temple, or any open space. The strong light came from some shining strips neatly arranged on the ceiling top. He lay on a snow-white bed, small but quite comfortable, high off the ground. The furniture and decorations were very strange, a lot of shining metal boxes and transparent utensils, and he had never seen anything like that before. Everything seemed to be shining and amazing. There was a quirky bracelet on his wrist and some strange metal pieces attached to his chest.

Alexander tried to get up, but failed because he was still weak. Always a brave and proud man, he struggled off the bed with trembling feet.

Four walls around were all covered with huge mirrors, from top to bottom, and he could see numerous his own reflections in those mirrors. He had never seen such huge mirror walls before. In his day there were only small polished bronze mirrors, and absolutely nothing like what he saw.

Suddenly he became scared. Was he dead? Was this Mount Olympus or the underworld? The last thing he remembered was all the pain he suffered, lying in the Babylon Palace on that hot summer night.

All of sudden something strange on his bedside table started to shriek, and his heart jumped into his throat. That strange thing had a little window with some fancy dancing color patterns inside.

"Hephaestion! Where are you!?" Alexander touched up and down those impenetrable mirror walls. If he was really dead, shouldn't he be able to see his Hephaestion? Didn't the priests in Siwa grant Hephaestion the Divine Hero status? "I am Alexander! Answer me!"

Nobody answered him, but a bunch of bright light appeared in the central of the space, then it turned into some letters, with a voice: "Dear Alexander, welcome to the twenty-second century! If you have any questions, please press this button!"

The voice had a really strange accent, which Alexander could barely understand. During his campaign he got used to all kinds of strange accents. Persian's, Egyptian's, Indian's, whatever. Even though not as good a linguist as Hephaestion, he had the ability to adapt and understand. Besides, the letters inside the light were basically correct.

But the voice said to press a button. What did that mean? And what on hell was a button?

Bold and curious, Alexander was not going to sit there giving up the opportunity for exploration, simply because he didn't understand. He pressed down fiercely even though he did not see anything like a "button" inside the light.

"Do you have any questions?" The voice asked immediately.

"Please tell me. Am I dead or alive? Where am I? How can I find my friend?" Alexander asked all these questions anxiously but still politely.

The answer came back. "You died before, and have now been successfully resurrected in our lab. Now it is the twenty-second century, that is, 2500 years after your death. Please provide your friend's name as well as your own. We are willing to help. "

Alexander's jaw dropped to the floor, and he was completely stunned by the answer.

It was not that he didn't believe in resurrection. In Egypt, everyone was convinced that Pharaohs would be resurrected in the future. He was the Pharaoh anointed by the High Priest. Who said he would not be resurrected?

But this place didn't look like Egypt, and the lights said a lab, what was that? How could it be that the God who resurrected him did not even know his name? What about Hephaestion? Could he be resurrected as well?

"Great Zeus-Amon!" Alexander fell down to his knees towards the beams of light. "I am your most humble and devoted son Alexander, thank you for the great favor you bestow on me! All the people in my empire are your pious followers!"

The light, however, seemed to lose the reaction somehow.

Alexander continued to bow down, and he wanted to ask God to resurrect Hephaestion as well.

The light suddenly intensified and became glaring. These letters appeared:

"Please chose an answer to the following questions:

1. Who are you?  
A: Alexander III of Macedon; B: Tutankhamun of Egypt; C: Richard the Lionhearted; D: Steve Jobs

2. Who is your father?  
A: Julia Caesar; B: George Clooney; C: Philip II of Macedon; D: Albert Einstein

3. Who is your mother?  
A: Cleopatra of Egypt; B: Lady Gaga; C: Angelina Jolie; D: Olympias of Epirus

4. What is the name of your best friend?  
A: Hephaestion; B: Judas Iscariot; C: Octavian Augustus; D: Marcus Junius Brutus

5. What is your favorite book?  
A: A Tale of Two Cities; B: Harry Potter; C: The Lord of the Rings; D: Iliad

6. Which city did you found?  
A: New York; B: Paris; C: Alexandria; D: Athens  
…

Alexander read those questions with aghast, his emotions went from adoration to contempt. God is omniscient, and he would never ask those stupid questions! Whoever he faced was definitely not God!

He stood up, holding his head high, and arrogantly declared: "First, you need to tell me your King's name! Ask your King to come and see me! Otherwise I will never answer the questions asked by some barbarians!" He jumped onto his bed and closed his eyes, not willing to say anything else.

Alexander was uneasy and nervous. He felt that he was being treated more like a prisoner facing interrogation, rather than a respected guest in a sacred temple.

Sometime later, a small hole appeared on the mirror wall. Alexander secretly cracked his eyes open a little bit, in order to see what is going on. He was really shocked by to see a metal monster. But the monster greeted him very politely, presenting him with a plate of... food?

Alexander already knew the location of the hole in the mirror wall. He pretended to accept food, and took advantage of the monster's negligence to seize its "legs" - actually a pair of wheels – and hit the hole in the mirror wall forcefully.

The mirror – which obviously was not made of bronze - shattered into numerous small particles, falling down like snow. He could hear screams behind the mirror wall. There were many big boxes with red and green shining lights. A group of people, short and tall, all wearing the same clothes, of different ages and skin colors, stood terrified and screamed.

Alexander shouted out loud and charged towards those people, carrying one arm of the unfortunate monster that he had just smashed. Before he could take two steps forward, suddenly he was sucked by a strong force into the air, and then thrown back onto the bed. Two belts automatically appeared from either side of the bed and tied him firmly to the bed.

"I protest!" Alexander shouted himself hoarse and struggled with all his strength. "Even prisoners have the right to choose to die with dignity! You have no right to treat me this way!" He believed he performed with more dignity and courage than Porus. But he was unwilling to accept the reality that he had become a prisoner.

That beam of light appeared again: "Please calm down Alexander, your body is hurt with broken glasses, and in need of treatment. Please believe that we have no ill intention. You are now in the twenty-second century, which is very different from the era you used to live. You need to adapt slowly. "

But Alexander did not appreciate those words. Throughout his life he always ordered people around, instead of being ordered around. Such an experience was definitely disastrous for him.

"My little cornflower (note 1), I am so glad you are not resurrected, I don't want you to see how your poor King suffers. He is now more hapless than Darius." His heart was heavy, but he had to keep a very aggressive and hard look, and spat on the beam of light that asked him to calm down.

The light started to tell him what happened after his death. His generals started killing each other and carving up his empires, as soon as he died. Within a few years, his family was murdered and his empire crumpled and split into several parts.

"You're lying! Nonsense!" Alexander could not believe the horrible news. His most trusted friends Ptolemy and Seleucus were the first to carve up his empire. His companions had fought and murdered each other for his inheritance. His whole family including his only son was brutally murdered.

Alexander became hysterical upon that terrible news. A metal monster struck on his arm quickly, and he fell into a deep but troubled sleep.

He dreamt of Hephaestion again. He had countless such dreams since his beloved's death. They galloped on horseback, laughing out loud, as happy as before. But suddenly he lost his little cornflower. No matter how desperately, he searched and searched, but couldn't find him.

Alexander woke up sobbing. Like many times before, his heart was in so much pain, like a sharp knife cut through it.

The light started lecturing him. "Cheer up, young man! Your empire is history. Forget it. Let's face the beautiful reality of today. Start living a happy life in the twenty-second century!"

The whole mirror wall suddenly became transparent, and Alexander could see bright sunshine and a blue sky, green grass and colorful flowers.

The light revealed to him the wonders of the twenty-second century, and Alexander watched with his mouth open. Overlapping layers of the roads, flying cars, pedestrians wearing weird clothes, fancy high-rise buildings. Everything looked strange but wonderful. The only somewhat familiar scene was Persepolis that he burned down, and those ruins remained a shadow of themselves two thousand years later. When he saw a few gray columns on the hill in Athens, he absolutely refused to believe this was the relic of the magnificent Temple of Athena that he visited as a young man.

All those novelties aroused Alexander's interest greatly. His ambition began to thrive. He swore that he would find a way to survive, to escape into this strange and beautiful world to re-establish his army and dynasty.

"Holographic screen." This was the name of the light. It also showed him various foods which looked very delicious for his choice. A "robot". This was the name of the metal monster who brought in those foods to let him enjoy, including wines that tasted wonderful. His bed rose up automatically, so that he could dine comfortably. But his legs were still bound. After the meal the robot gave him a sponge bath and washed his head, trimmed his hair and gave him a clean shave under his guidance. Alexander looked at his radiant reflection in the mirror, quite satisfied with the robot's service. Unfortunately he had not even a penny in hand now, and therefore could not give a reward.

Alexander got a pen and some paper upon his request. The paper was white, smooth and thin, and his writings by the pen were slender. He was accustomed to writing large characters, and each paper could hardly hold several sentences (note 2). Alexander was a man with great ability to adapt. He soon got used to the new paper and pen, and began to record his adventures, with the hope that one day he would find Hephaestion. He could show them off to his beloved.

Below is an excerpt of Alexander's letter to Hephaestion:

"My dear beloved little cornflower, You'll never guess where I am! I am resurrected! After 2500 years that is, yes. I temporarily lost my freedom, but it is very exciting. A new unknown world, waiting for my conquest.

Please do not worry about me, there is a mental monster called a robot who is taking good care of me. I do not miss Bagoas at all because the robot is doing such a good job to replace him. The only thing I have to do is to find you as soon as possible, to help you come back to me. We will never be separated again, either in life or death, or reborn."

Below is an excerpt of a secret lab report:

"The world's first cloned mummy tissue, culture records number 09, was unearthed from unrecorded and owner-less pyramids in Egypt (presumably Alexander the Great's tomb).

Male, height 166 cm, age 33. Time of death was around 323 BC, for unknown reasons.

The man is Indo-European, gold chestnut hair, blue-gray pupil left and right pupil brown, naïve and handsome looking, physically strong, well-built body, possessing physically quick reactions. Skull, chest, arms, legs, all have wounds and scars; necrosis in right lower lung lobe due to penetrating wound; alcoholic cirrhosis, brain damage, hypertension, mild epilepsy, and severe bipolar disorder could be cured through gene repair or clinical operations.

The male has a high IQ, a child prodigy, narcissistic personality, serious violent tendencies, mild paranoia, with psychological therapy strongly recommended.

If the man proves to be Alexander the Great, then the experiment will be an unprecedented breakthrough."

Note 1: Alexander called Hephaestion his cornflower because of the beautiful blue color of the flower.

Note 2: I believe the author is confusing the ancient Greek stylus with the Chinese brush pen. People wrote on bamboo or wood with a small brush pen, in the 4th century BC in China; you had to write the letters pretty big, even though there were small writings as well.


	2. Chapter 2 - The Movie

Hello everyone, I'm sorry it took a while, quite a while, for me to translate the second chapter. I hope you haven't forgotten the story!

Alexander kept adjusting to the modern lifestyle and technology of the twenty-second century, and he also had to negotiate with the men who resurrected him to find out what they wanted from him.

Meanwhile, Alexander tried to amuse himself with the Alexander movie, and… what a disaster _that_ turned out to be.

Many thanks to my dear hubby Steve, who serves as my beta and edits my story. Thank you my love!

Enjoy the new chapter!

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On the third week of his resurrection, Alexander began to feel horribly lonely and bored. While everything in the new world looked so exotic and exiting, being detained in a small space with only a screen and robot at his service – this was certainly not the kind of life that he liked.

To his aghast, soon his food portion was significantly reduced, especially meat and wine. Only a small cup of wine was provided every day, and that the cup in his opinion was smaller than a bird' feeding jar. Alexander protested angrily, only to be told by the screen that it was for the sake of his own health.

Like a professional salesman, the holographic screen tried desperately to sell his so-called healthy lifestyle, which contained a stingy diet of boiled vegetables and fruits, very little meat and wine, and plenty of drills on some awful-looking machines. Those machines looked very much like tortures to Alexander. But he saw on the screen that many people in the twenty-second century very much believed in so-called healthy lifestyle, doing drills on those 'torture machines', even with very painful expressions on their faces.

The screen showed a man with a slim and slender body following such a recommended lifestyle. The screen then made a body of his own effigy, and warned that if he continued to consume the vast amount of alcohol and meat he would ended up not only fat and ugly, but also likely to suffer a stroke.

Alexander scorned such warnings contemptuously. But he was secretly horrified. He did not want to get back to Hephaestion with such an unflattering image. He was very proud of his lean and strong body, and he certainly didn't want to risk becoming fat and ugly. What would Hephaestion say?

Instead of protesting blindly, Alexander tried to fill his belly with boring vegetables and limes. With great curiosity he tried one of those 'torture machines' only to find that it was nothing more than a few springs and weights. Even though he adjusted the machine to the maximum intensity, the machine soon broke down. Its components cannot bear up his strengths, since he was used to strong bows and arrows. Finally he decided to scale the walls with heavy weights, his form of exercise.

Alexander has his own plan. He became fascinated with some new transportation equipment presented on the screen, which looked like a small aircraft driven by Sun God Apollo. Alexander studied the driving technique enthusiastically, although there were so many strange terminologies that he never heard before and the screen had trouble translating them into Greek. With his genius, Alexander figured out the use of those weird instruments, and found out that as long as the settings were correct, those small coasters could fly automatically; even a woman could easily control and fly such a craft, which made him in awe of the modern technology. He believed that he would soon be able to find ways to get such a small coaster, fly away from this place, and begin his new journey.

"My little cornflower: what a great pleasure it would be to fly such a rapid and flexible chariot, think about all the wonderful things we could do together." Alexander dreamed about the new adventures he would have with Hephaestion at his side.

Alexander expressed strong dissatisfaction, communicating only with the screen. Even though the screen had a vast knowledge of everything, incomparable with anyone, Aristotle included. But he was no longer a schoolboy. He was a Great King, and the other party refused to recognize it and he considered it a serious insult. However, he must figure out his current situation. To be held in his opinion is very disgraceful, since he did not fail or commit any mistakes to justify such detention. Alexander decided that he would only leave honorably, cheered enthusiastically by his people. Besides, he must use their technology to find a way to resurrect Hephaestion, and apparently negotiation is the best strategy under such circumstances.

Perhaps out of fear, the king or the leader refused to show up. On the screen, Alexander finally saw a so-called leader, who seemed to be the head of the lab. From his euphemistic questions, Alexander found out that his resurrection was motivated not out of respect for God or worship for himself, as they seemed only interested in his famed treasures.

Alexander was shocked and humiliated, it looked like his resurrection actually had no sacred meaning, but a conspiracy concocted by a bunch of evil people with special skills.

Furiously Alexander issued an ultimatum, requesting that their leader to show up and negotiate personally within three days, and he must confess all their motives, plots and goals, and pay tributes to show sincerity. The reason Alexander didn't take more drastic measures was his consideration for Hephaestion's resurrection plan. The lab was useful and valuable, and they may agree to a good deal.

Even though treated with ultimate respect, Alexander was very agitated. He was well aware of the current situation which was very unfavorable for him. He was just an empty-handed prisoner. The only thing valuable was the information of the treasures those people were interested in, which he wasn't sure of himself. But he mustn't show weakness, throughout his life he never showed weakness to anyone, no matter how strong and intimidating his opponents were. The only exception was his little cornflower, who conquered his heart when he was a little boy. He could only bluff, forcing them to respect him and value his worth. His fearlessness and momentum were his only weapons, under the situation.

Alexander remained naked until he met all the members in the laboratory on the screen. To his shock and embarrassment, there was an outrageously tall but decent-looking woman who talked with some authority. He thought the lab should be a men's world, just the same as the battlefield and gymnastics, and his face flushed with embarrassment at the thought to be a woman's captive. He secretly cursed those damned Amazon descendants, and wrapped a sheet tightly around his body.

But soon the robot brought him plenty of so-called modern day clothes, which were custom-made for him. The mirror to the back garden had been opened, and he had to wear a decent outfit. Alexander never minded wearing apparels of his conquered peoples, and he immediately set out to try these clothes with the help of the robot.

Ah, those clothes were mostly awkward, the Persia and Cartier clothes had been complicated enough. But now, not only were there many inside and outside layers to wear, but he had to use some strange things called buttons and zippers. Alexander tried for a long time to learn to use the buttons. Then he struggled with a choking stiff collar, tying a silk ribbon which looked more like a noose. Finally, he firmly rejected the set of so-called suit, and preferred to wear a simple t-shirt. At least that dress material made him feel very comfortable. Alexander was used to the cavalry linen slacks. Those tight twenty-second century pants made him very uncomfortable.

The worst thing was the shoe. Alexander looked at his fat toes, despite a lifetime on horseback. They had always been free, so how could they cram into the narrow pointed shoes like a battleship? But in the end, he had to believe that in the twenty-second century anything is possible. He forced those torture shoes on his feet, but as a pleasant surprise he felt no pain. The Screen explained that those shoes had memory functions and adjusted the shape of his feet automatically. He was even more pleased that these shoes increased his height and made him look taller. He didn't need to walk on tiptoes, like those stuffed felt boots he used to wear when he married the Princess Statira.

The garden was too small for him, and there was an unpleasant smell in the air, Alexander soon started to sneeze. The screen ruefully explained to him that it was the consequences of air pollution. Although in the past two centuries many measures had been taken to clean up the air, the air quality could never return to the same purity as two thousand years ago.

The negotiation remained at an impasse, and Alexander knew they did not dare to hurt him; otherwise they would not have resurrected him to start with. He thought about Hephaestion, how cool and composed he was during all of his diplomatic missions and negotiations, and decided to learn from his little cornflower. And after a while all these pretenses of the refined and civilized way almost drove him mad.

* * *

To cheer him up the screen showed him many movies, shows and plays with his own story as the major theme. Alexander randomly chose one, and was informed that it was a very costly epic movie made a hundred years ago. His heart burst with pride and joy, as his lifetime goal was to achieve everlasting glory like his ancestor Achilles.

The movie began with some strange old man who babbled for a long time, and Alexander was told that it was Ptolemy. Greek dramas always started with some serious monologue, and Alexander was quite used to that. However, this self-proclaimed Ptolemy had nothing in common with the man he knew. And he consoled himself that the player must be wearing a mask.

Next came a blonde woman and a little child, then a tall ugly man with a blind eye. He was horrified when the man tried to rape the woman, and hold down the button to pause the movie. "Are they crazy? That was my father! And he dared to abuse my mother like that? Who wrote this play? He should be hanged!" He recalled that his parents fought a lot, but his father never completely lost control and misbehaved like a drunken vagabond, especially in his presence. The family scandals were never exposed to the public. The screen suggested him to fast-forward the scene, and Alexander continued, albeit reluctantly.

His boyhood actor was a very handsome boy. Alexander knew that he in fact had never been so slim, but there was no necessity to point out such beautiful errors. That wrestling scene with Hephaestion gave him nostalgia. The following line made him laugh "Alexander had never been defeated in his life, except by Hephaestion's thighs." But then he was agitated. How dare that damn traitor proclaim such things to the public!

All the people entered adulthood in the play. Alexander was attracted by the tall and muscular man with a pair of big blue eyes and long hair. When he was told that the man wearing a blonde wig and face heavily powdered, was actually portraying himself, he was livid with anger. He made ardent request that the movie change actors and costumes immediately. The screen piteously told him the movie was shot one hundred years ago, the screen writers and actors had already died. As for the weird costume, that's because the actor tried too hard to pretend to be young, and it ended up that way. "Well, at least he is tall. " Alexander tried to console himself. And the actor played Hephaestion had those beautiful cerulean eyes just like his little cornflower.

Alexander found to his shock that he was already at Gaugamela. "What happened!? Where are the battles in Thebes and sieges in Tyre and Gaza? Where is the battle of the Granicus and where is Egypt? Did I fly to Persia in a coaster ride!?" but soon he stopped complaining and concentrated on the battle scene.

"Oh no! This is all so wrong!" He kept exclaiming. He feared for the chaos of the phalanx, which meant failure and death. He tried to reach for his sword but there was none at his waist. "These people are all crazy! Did they want me to die?" His strategy was to stay clear of the Persian's main force, and strike at their weakest point. He desperately wanted to call the soldiers to fight according to his intentions, but no one listened to him on the screen. Shouting his throat sore, he found that he surprisingly won the battle. "So they depicted Greeks as madmen and the Persians idiots." Alexander signed helplessly.

The grand entry into Babylon scene made him quite happy, although there were still some discrepancies with the real history, he was deeply intoxicated by the wonderful victorious atmosphere. Good times never lasted though. Soon he was shocked by Bagoas "What in the hell is he doing here? How could he be so tall? Shouldn't he be with Darius in the mountains?" He was even more shocked by Princess Statira, who looked so horribly old. "If she really looked like that, I would have never married her!" Alexander lamented covering his eyes with his hands.

Afterwards Hephaestion came to him, but Bagoas hung on. He had to thank the eunuch to make him leave reluctantly. "Where in the hell did they get this awkward guy! He is nothing like Bagoas! I would have kicked him out had he been that stupid!" Soon he forgot all about Bagoas and focused on the blue-eyed handsome actor, and immersed himself in the gentle memories with his little cornflower.

In the movie he seemed to be more stupid than Bagoas. "What in the hell is that fool doing?" Alexander was shocked see that fool blabbing on the balcony, but dared not look at his beloved at his side. He almost pulled his hair out before he finally heard a solemn pledge of love from the fool. "Oh my little cornflower, I hope you have half the patience of that guy. If I'm really as stupid as that fool, I'm afraid you would have left a long time ago, perhaps with some scathing sarcasm as well." Alexander sighed deeply in his heart. But his other fear wasn't realized, as he was afraid their passions would be exposed ruthlessly to the public like his parents. The screen explained cautiously that two thousand years later, the culture was vastly difference from his own time. A public feature could not have a same-sex lover, otherwise his career would be ruined. Hence in the movie their relationship was written so vaguely. Alexander blinked his eyes confused, he couldn't figure out why people would find true love between soul mates wrong, and since when did such stupid cynicism become popular?

Soon he faced a real terror. In the movie he was infatuated with an old, ugly and fierce black woman. The screen explained this was Roxane, who he insisted on marrying despite strong opposition from his counsel. Cassander, who never participated in the east campaign, sprang out from nowhere to fight with him, and Alexander had no heart to fuss over it. He cursed everyone involved in the movie – how dare they belittle his aesthetic judgment, and insult his intelligence! He punched the buttons ruthlessly. "Even a lunatic should have his limit! Otherwise, he should be locked up in the asylum, rather than wandering free and slandering others!"

The Screen tried to calm him down, explaining that according to his philosophy of a harmonious world, the black people should be respected as well. Alexander had no interest for this explanation as the plot became beyond outrageous. Hephaestion was crying bitterly out of jealousy because he married that disgusting woman, and all the ugly details of their mating process was publicly displayed, very lengthy as well. Roxanne was a hideous wild cat rather than a woman, much less than a Queen of a civilized world. He attacked the screen with spittle, fists, plates, and chairs repeatedly. But he discovered that it was just a beam of light, simply indestructible. Panting and looking at the satisfactory expression on that ugly face, Alexander spit out everything he ate that day, until he had nothing to spit but bile.

He thought he had seen Hell, but no. The play went on and it deteriorated into a total horror show. Now he was in India, fighting his famous battle against King Porus. Instead of the smart strategy of crossing the monsoon-swollen river to catch Porus' army in the flank, and attacking the elephants with long spears from a distance, he was depicted differently. The movie showed a hot-headed, brainless and desperate Alexander, forcing his solders to die needlessly. It even showed him forcing Bucephalus to make a completely reckless charge at the elephants, with a pitiful short sword in hand. The Director must have decided that Alexander wanted to commit suicide and turned one of his most epic victories into an unmitigated total disaster. Alexander could not even spit out the bile.

Finally Alexander decided to stop the self-flagellation, and he crushed the remote with his feet. Vowing that he would never watch another movie, he began to write a protest letter. His mood shifted from rage to sadness, as he could not imagine himself with such a horrible image, in what was called an "epic" movie dedicated to himself. Is that how the world remembered him? His brilliant achievements were cut down and forgotten, his dazzling military genius horribly distorted, his glorious campaigns like chaotic games. And he couldn't recognize himself, his companions, and the army he loved as part of himself.

At the same time, he and his parents' private lives were pitifully distorted, exaggerated and demonstrated blatantly in the public. He became a clown in a comic, only for people to gossip and laugh at, and even Hephaestion couldn't escape the shame of being depicted as a poor abandoned spouse who sulked in the dark. Never in the movie was Hephaestion mentioned even once, his important contributions to Alexander's victories and their common dreams and beliefs of cultural integration. Instead of a divine hero who was remembered for his military genius and epic accomplishments, he was relegated into an interesting nobody with a background of numerous juicy gossips.

Well, his resurrection must be a conspiracy of evil! Alexander decided that the negotiation could no longer be protracted, and today he would have a showdown with his opponents. If his demands were not met, he would rather die with honors than live in shame.


End file.
